A girl’s gotta do, what a girl’s gotta do…too bad she’s gotta do it with someone new.
According to the Urban dictionary, a best friend is “a very special people in your life. They are the first people you think about when you make plans. They are the first people you go to when you need someone to talk to. You will phone them up just to talk about nothing, or the most important things in your life. When you’re sad they will try their hardest to cheer you up. They give the best hugs in the world! They are the shoulder to cry on, because you know that they truly care about you. In most cases they would take a bullet for you, coz it would be too painful to watch you get hurt.”
Let me ask you though,
Well I can tell you now that I thought I did until this year. She was what I call a “phone friend”and trying to get a hold of her was like pulling teeth. I recently have just given up on trying to get through to her because I am always the one trying here and I go to her house and I make the effort, but when I ask her to come to mine, she comes up with one of her inane and annoying excuses that I have heard for a while now.
There are only so many times that you can keep trying in a relationship, any relationship before you have to realise that the other party is not going to be able to live up to your expectations or be who you want them to be and that is what I have come to realise.
What makes me sad is that neither of us have fought for this relationship. I am too tired to fight anymore and I have too much to deal with myself to keep trying to talk to my best friend. I just wish once that she would call me without wanting something. I wish she would call me just for the hell of it, but I know her…
For as long as I remember, I have complained about the fact that she is shit with her phone and now, I just don’t care anymore. There are many ways to get a hold of me and she doesn’t try to use them, any of them. If there is someone like that in your life, then they are not going to change and no matter how many times you tell yourself that they might or that things might get better or that things are fine, when you walk away, you’ll realise that either they don’t care or that they will realise how much they miss you.
I told my best friend everything and we were close while we were at school. I told her that I we wouldn’t survive after school, but she swore to me she would. Well, I can see how much she cared. I have to start looking after myself and you should too.
If she by some miracle sees this then maybe she could see how sad I am and how hurt I am that she won’t call me and that our friendship seems to be being forgotten. But then again, she’s leaving in January for Utah and so all I can really say is…GOODBYE! Goodbye and I’m sorry things came to this. I’m sorry that every time I try to get a hold of you I’m greeted by an answer machine and I’m sorry that our friendship is gone…
Every passing day, you’re closer to being forgotten and even so, I wish our friendship had not been killed along with our fate.
For all of you who have lost a best friend or had to turn your back on them, then have this video:
Goodbye and goodnight sweet friendship.